Thinking in Internet speak

There is no turning back.

The Internet has completely altered the way I think.

Literally

I used to have a holding tank somewhere in my brain, a place where curious inquiries could gather. They would mix about up there until such time as I happened upon a set of dusty, gold-lettered encyclopedias. Gone are the days of paging through Abraham Lincoln, Asteroid, and Architecture. Asylum can now be accessed directly through the tap-dancing click of my fingertips. That is, provided I don’t get distracted by Lindsay Lohan’s court outfit or the latest sneezing panda video (I wonder how many views it takes to get people to click on something just to find out why it is so popular?).

There is no need to hold my questions in anymore, no need to keep track of the answers to previous inquiries. I carry the internet with me everywhere I go, and when I feel the need to look for answers, I fire at will.

Weather Saint Paul?

Symptoms achilles tendonitis?

internal temp chicken legs?

food rationing world war 1?

Who invented peanut butter?

Why (copy paste: invented peanut butter)?

Treating the experience as though communing with a magic eight ball, when I happen upon an answer I don’t like, I just re-search.

Should I run with a cold?

If you get a cold, it is best to rest for a few days.

Backspace. Scan down. Click.

distance running can compromise your immune system and lengthen the time it takes to recover.

Backspace. Scan down. Click

As long as your symptoms are above the neck, go for it

refresh

It seems that even when away from my phone or my desk, I now think in searchable terms. For example, when I opened my closet door to find the cat rolling around in my sweaty running clothes, I didn’t think to myself  “How odd. I wonder why my cat is attracted to the smell of human sweat?”. Instead I thought “cat attracted human sweat?”.

Incidentally, the weather is currently 20 degrees and cloudy, the symptoms of achilles tendonitis are.. well.. pain in the achilles tendon (not sure what I expected with that one), the safest internal temp for cooking a chicken leg is 165, wheat, sugar, and meat were rationed during world war 1 to save the “good” nourishment for the soldiers (haha I wonder what we would consider “good” nourishment were we to ration food today?) and what Americans have come to know as peanut butter was invented by a doctor Ambrose Straub in the 1890’s. He was looking for a protein source for elderly people who struggled with eating meat due tooth loss. Interesting, because during the middle ages when people had notoriously bad teeth, the culinary solution was to cook meat into a soft, saucy stew that could be gummed down.

As for cats and human sweat? Rather than filter through pages of cat-lover websites, where humans post comments for their cats (with meows interjecting) and I decided that some mysteries are better left un-searched.

But if you want to know more, you know what to do.

Please follow and like us:

Healing cabbage: desperate measures

Winter Cabbage Rolls Recipe

“I’m sorry, what was that you said.. cabbage?”

George and I were slogging along the river road, 7 miles in and relaxed into a comfortable talking pace.

“Yes, okay, I know this sounds strange, but trust me. Continue reading Healing cabbage: desperate measures

Please follow and like us:

Coco-nuts, but are they crazy?

I glanced at the clock. 30 minutes to go, and the nerves finally settling down. Before I had time to click through to the next slide, a hand shot into the air.

“There seem to be mixed suggestions about whether or not coconut oil is healthy. What do you think about coconut oil?” Continue reading Coco-nuts, but are they crazy?

Please follow and like us: